Friday, September 28, 2007

My Man

Well, with all the commotion of a new baby, it's easy to forget about the man who made it all happen. Samuel has been such a wonderful husband and father, and I'm so grateful to be married to such a wonderful, sexy man. :) Finally I'm doing the "my man" post. I just re-read my answers, and it seems I have to make comments with every answer. Oh well. If you were in a big hurry, you probably wouldn't be reading my blog right now, right?

MY MAN:
1. Who is your man? Samuel Bigler
2. How long have you been together? Since May 2005
3. Dating/Engaged/Married? Dated for 3 months, engaged for 5, married for almost 2 years
4. How old is your man? Just turned the big 3-0, and he's not happy about it.

You or your man?
1. Who eats more? Hmm...this is a tough one. Him I guess.
2. Who said "I love you" first? I was totally ready to admit it first, but he was like, "don't say it yet!" Then he said it first later.
3. Who kissed who first? He kissed me first (I wanted to make him wait as long as I could, you know, to keep him wanting it, but I only lasted a week.)
3.5 Who proposed to who? The picture says it all.
4. Who weighs more? Samuel, although I ALMOST caught up to him when I was 40 weeks pregnant.
5. Who sings better? Samuel's better than I am, he's quite the singer. We'll do duets in church and stuff though.
6. Who's Older? Samuel, by three years
7. Who's smarter? If it's book smart, it's me. If it's "world smart" it's him. He's just smart about the way the world works, and the people who live in it.

Different Ways
8. Who's temper is worse? Mine flares much faster, but if I really keep pushing him, he'll get really ticked. Unfortunately, when that happens it strikes me as really funny, and I laugh, and he just gets madder.
9. Who does the laundry? He used to do it, but now that I am constantly covered in milk, throw-up, and baby poo, it's me.
9.5 Who does the dishes? He does. Love that!
10. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? Me, closer to the baby.
11. Who's feet are bigger? Samuel- size 12. Hard to find shoes in that size sometimes.
12. Who's hair is longer? Mine
13. Who's better with the computer? He's better at fixing it when it freezes/crashes, etc, but I like to think I'm an internet pro.
14. Who mows the lawn? No lawn at our apartment, but someday...he will.
15. Who pays the bills? He pays most of them, but gives me money and lets me pay a few with my old checking account since I love writing checks. I'm silly, huh?
16. Who cooks dinner? I do. I love cooking. But I'm not getting around to it much these days.
17. Who drives when you are together? Samuel
18. Who pays when you go out to dinner? No matter who has the money that day, I like him to actually "pay" since it makes me feel like he's all chivalrous and stuff.
19. Who's the most stubborn? Well, I think I am, but I try to disguise my ways.
20. Who is the first one to admit when they're wrong? It used to be me, but he's gotten really good at it since I'm right so often. HAHA just kidding. Kind of.
21. Who's parents do you see more? His, because they like to come out here to visit us.
23. Who asked who out? I asked him out. He was totally playing games with my mind by not asking me out (he said he was just scared I'd break his heart, whatever) so I took matters into my own hands and asked him out. I was raised NOT to be aggressive like that, but believe it or a not, I took a Marriage Prep class at BYU that gave us ASSIGNMENTS to ask guys out. So that's how I had the guts to do it.
24. What did you do? We went boating to a Sandbar in Kaneohe Bay with some people from Shriners Hospital, where I was interning. (see a picture from a previous post here--)
25. Who's more sensitive? Me. He likes to call it HYPER-sensitive. Tee hee.
26. Who's taller? He is, and his height is one of my favorite things about him. 6' 2"
27. Who has more friends? He is extremely social and I usually have to drag him away from church on Sundays cause he'll talk to EVERYONE but now that I have all my blogging friends, plus my Hawaii friends, I can probably say I have the most. That's good for me, since I wasn't always great at getting close to girlfriends.
29. Who has more siblings? I have 2 bros, 3 sis, he has 2 bros, 1 sis.
30. Who wears the pants in the relationship? My mom warned him, thoroughly, before he married me that I would "rule the roost"--however, I really must say that we share those pants really well, and that's exactly how I like it.

Monday, September 24, 2007

One Month Old

Happy one month birthday to Kalia!!

You guys keep encouraging me to post pictures and video clips (thanks!) so here's a few more from my endless supply.

An idea from my sister Krystal, she takes a comparison picture every month. I thought it was kinda funny that Kalia's arms and the bear's arms are in the same position.As you can see she's plumping up nicely. I think she's about 12 lbs already, with rolls everywhere! Samuel gets his revenge with a "sleeping" picture of his own.This is Jack Clark (4 months old). Michael and Kat Clark moved into our ward a few months ago from Tennessee (Michael is from there, Kat is from Provo...you'll see her in future pictures for sure) and we love them to death.

Friday, September 21, 2007

Sleep Advice Please! And a baby blessing...

My baby is 4 weeks old today...I can't believe how the time is flying. This is how they grow up so fast, right?? Kalia's just starting to settle into some patterns, so I have been trying to figure some things out. I've read some great books (Baby Whisperer, BabyWise, 12 Hours sleep by 12 weeks old) and I want to combine them all to create a good little sleeper. I'm not sure how soon to start though, since they all suggest different ages.

I've been pretty much feeding her every few hours, including through the night. A couple times she's gone 4-5 hours at night, especially if I'm careful and I don't let her take long naps during the day. Usually by the second feeding (around 6:30 a.m.) I just pull her in bed with me and feed her, we both fall asleep, and she doesn't get burped or changed. That's how this happens:
Cute, I know, but I don't think any of us sleeps very soundly with her making lots of noises and grunts . Anyway, I love sleeping with her, but I think it's time we all started getting better rest. Here's a few things I need advice on:

1. Swaddling: It's too warm to do it here, unless we turn our air conditioner on. It's worth it to me to turn it on every night, and swaddle her, if it makes her sleep better and longer. But what about during the day? She's constantly waking herself up with her startles and flailing arms. When will this stop?

Which brings me to my next question:
2. I want her to learn to go to sleep on her own, so I've been getting her drowsy (usually by holding her, putting her in the swing, or the bouncy chair) then laying her down, but as soon as she feels herself going down, she wakes up, gets all disoriented and totally wakes up, and I have to start over, usually several times. (nice double chin by the way, eh?)

Is there a trick to this? Is swaddling day and night for every nap the answer? Or do I make her just cry herself to sleep with her flailing limbs? (This is really hard for a first time mother, no doubt, but it's especially hard here because we're in this tiny apartment and everyone has their windows open, and I can't escape the cries. Neither can any of the neighbors.)

We are going to St. George next week (more on that in a second) and I'm thinking maybe I'll try the "cry it out" method at my mom's house, since there are solid walls and doors to block out the crying...what do you guys think? Maybe I'll just let her sleep naked on her changing table, since that's like her favorite place in the whole world. Just kidding.
Here's a little video clip of her...doing nothing absolutely nothing...but enjoying her changing table. Ignore my "mommy voice" please.
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Finally, I am THRILLED to say that we're COMIN' HOME for a visit!! YEAH!!

WE ARE GOING TO BLESS KALIA ON SEPT 30TH AND ANY OF YOU WHO'D LIKE TO COME ARE INVITED. The church is on Brigham Road (the East chapel, furthest from the freeway) and the ward meets at 9 a.m. The address is 1222 E. Brigham Road. We'll probably have lots of people over at the house on Sunday and Monday, so anybody is welcome to come. And we are planning on coming to Mother's Group on Wednesday. And someone is my ward is having a baby shower for us on Thursday evening, and a Dixie Football game on Saturday night that my BIL Wayne is playing in, so there's a whole variety of opportunities for us to see each other- I'd love to see any of my blogging friends, especially since I haven't seen many of you for years.

Well, speaking of a sleeping baby, she finally is asleep, and this is probably my only chance to shower. Ta Ta for now.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

My Favorite Things

You guys are probably getting depressed from reading my blog. I have a few more bits of bad news.

All those antibiotics I had to take for my infections killed off my "good" bacteria, and now I have thrush in the, uh, milk jugs. Nothing a little topical cream can't take care of, but poor Kalia is having a hard time eating, I think it's either made the milk taste funny or her mouth or throat is sore.

Also, today I saw a urologist. The good news: my kidney stone is only 2mm, and it's resting at the bottom of my kidney. It might not kill me to pass it, ...but it could be there for awhile. I'm going to dissolve it with my mind powers. Just kidding.

The bad news: The pain in my right side is NOT related to the kidney stone like I thought. He let me see my CAT scan results, and besides the kidney stone it shows a possible cyst in the liver, possible blood clot, and/or possible spleen issues. He's referrring me back to the Internist. Back to Mystery Diagnosis.

Still, I maintain that life is good. I'm trying so hard to be positive and to try to learn what I'm supposed to learn. Maybe this is God's idea of compelling me to be humble...I hope I learn quickly. Anyway, the blessings in my life completely outweigh the challenges right now, which in perspective, are still very small.

I didn't do the "Favorite Things" swap that a lot of you guys did, but mostly that's because these favorite things aren't swappable: :)

My favorite things come from this sweet little spirit in this chubby little body.My favorite sounds are her coos and her sighs of contentment, or most of all, the way she gulps down milk with such pleasure. My favorite things to see are the moments when she finds her hands and fingers and happily sucks on them. The best sight of all are the darling little smiles that have just started to happen as she looks at us in recognition.

My favorite smell is the smell of her skin, especially her head.

My favorite moments: when I get to feed her, and we sit in the quiet with her little tummy laying on mine, and I can feel her breathing; or when we get a really good burp out; or when she wraps her tiny hand around my finger and won't let go.

My favorite thing is being a mother, and starting to understand what God and His Love is really all about.So congratulations to all my pregnant blogging friends, I know of at least six of you...and to all the rest of us...let's have more babies!!

Monday, September 17, 2007

Life is Good

This weekend we finally re-entered "real life". It's good to be back. We went down to Waikiki to see an airshow by the Thunderbirds. Sorry...I have no details on why or what or who they are, but it was the 60th anniverary of something...
I couldn't believe she could sleep through such loud noise.
Saturday night we were able to go to a dinner party to meet the new Hawaii Honolulu mission president and his wife. They are here from Salt Lake City, and I think they're great. It was for all the bishops and ward mission leaders, and Samuel is the WML. We were like the youngest people there, but we had a great time. I thought I'd share a little Hawaiian Love...this is the way to relax after eating lots of roasted pig. (Our Stake President is playing the guitar. I love that man! He also plays the ukulele, electric guitar, drums, and conga drums.) And to my little sis, Tara, who plays the Ukulele herself, notice the ukulele being played by the guy on the couch. Isn't it gorgeous?
Sorry, these clips aren't the best.

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And finally, some hula if you're so inclined. It's so beautiful, isn't it?
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Okay, finally, today is my first day at home alone with Kalia, and this is how we entertain ourselves. My pediatrician said to give Kalia some tummy time so she can strengthen her neck muscles...but instead she is working out those leg muscles!! I thought it was so funny, I had to share...am I mean mom for having a laugh at her expense?

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Saturday, September 15, 2007

a KIDNEY STONE??

I have a kidney stone. They did another cat scan on Thursday and found it. We are waiting for the "full report" so I can't tell you now how big it is or if we are going to do some crazy blasting procedure to break it up, all I can say is that this explains both the side pain and the abnormal blood test. And I'm scared to death of what's going to happen when it's time to pass it.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Privacy

Okay, first of all, I really hope I didn't forget to add anyone for the private blog thing. I apologize if that happened, and I hope you guys will let me know if anyone got forgotten, or if anyone in the future wants to be added.

Since you're all dying to know, the reason I went private was to prevent a certain someone from reading the blog. Some of you know, and the rest of you are about to find out, that Samuel was married before, for 2 unhappy years, and it ended in divorce. Sad story, but really happy for me. The ex-wife has struggled a lot and made some bad decisions since then. We found out from his sister-in-law that the Ex was reading the blog. Samuel asked me to go private-- what can ya do? Google just makes it so easy to find people.

Other news: I've been back to the hospital two more times, and been in to see an Internal Medicine doctor. The pain in my side hasn't gone away, although the 2 wks of antibiotics decreased the pain. The Internist found some abnormal results in a blood test that he did on me, and his first fear was that it was a blood clot. First I had to have a cat scan to make sure it wasn't in my lungs (that can kill you). Then, yesterday, they sent me back to have an ultrasound done on my legs. They didn't find anything there either. I feel like I'm on the show "Mystery Diagnosis" or "House" because they just keep eliminating what it's NOT. I don't feel too worried though, I just wish I could finish recovering normally.

Samuel's family left tonight. Here' s a few pictures from the time they were here.

A huge congratulations to his older brother, Oliver, who proposed to Renee, my soon-to-be SIL, while he was here. (Oliver is the oldest kid and in his mid-thirties, so needless to say, we're all thrilled.)
We found that Kalia really likes sleeping on her side. I have always been a side sleeper. Actually, one of my books says that babies inherit "position preference" from their parents. Do any of your babies like to sleep the same way as you or your hubby? (Again, I hope you all understand about all the baby-in-diaper pictures. Samuel is installing another air conditioning unit right now as I write this. We are so dang hot.
I finally got out of the house for something other than a hospital visit. Sam's parents took us to Costco. We stopped at a beach park to feed Kalia and his mom took this shot.When we got to Costco, I was already tired and worn out. His parents suggested I drive a motor cart. At first I was embarrassed, but then I quit caring, and I realized how NICE it is to shop that way! They are so fun!

Grandma Bigler couldn't resist, she had to buy a MuMu for Kalia. We were all spoiled while they were here.

Thursday, September 06, 2007

First Movie Attempt

Thanks everyone, for your e-mail addresses, I will give it a few more days before I make the switch to private. Please don't worry, it's nothing scary, and as soon as I actually go private I will put your minds to rest. If you are really dying to know, email me and I'll tell ya!

I am actually trying to post a video for the first time. It's not much, just Samuel singing to Kalia as she looks on in amazement (I guess that he sounds just like Jack Johnson?) Haha- and I hope you can tell he says "give a dang", to edit it for all our virgin ears. Sorry that I didn't hold the camera steady. Let's see if the video works.
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Monday, September 03, 2007

A First Bath to Remember

I really need to download picasa and start doing some collages. For now, here's the funny story of Kalia's first bath:Her umbilical cord fell off Friday night, and so decided to attempt the first bath. She didn't like her sponge baths, so we weren't sure how she would like the real thing. We don't have a real tub, but we do have a baby tub, which she'll probably outgrow in about, oh, two weeks. ;0)

Oh, and I should tell you, she was acting like she needed to have a good little poopie, but couldn't get it out. We got tired of waiting, and got on with the bath.
She surprised us and LOVED it. She was as good as gold as we washed her all over. Then, when we washed her hair, we gave her a pacifier to keep her calm. She did so good. We decided it must have reminded her of the womb.We were almost done when we heard some BUBBLES in the water! Apparently it DID remind her of the womb, cause last time she was there she pooped in there too. We quickly pulled her out of the water and washed off her little bum. She never made a peep. It must have felt good to get it out. We thought she was done pooping.

She wasn't. I had just put her in this gorgeous white hooded towel that my mom made just for her, when the poop came shooting out. We were all laughing SO hard, and it hurt so bad to laugh, but it was just too funny. (BTW, look how tiny our kitchen is!)Thank goodness we had Grandma and Grandpa Bigler there to help wash out the towel and the tub as we cleaned off the babe.

We washed her AGAIN...and bundled her up in a little robe......and she was happy as can be. So, we're learning as we go, and wow, it sure is fun.

Friday, August 31, 2007

E.R.

No, not the show. I got to take a little trip to the emergency room last night. I'd been having pains on the right side of my stomach throughout the day. I figured it had to be trapped gas, a common side effect of a c-section. I took a walk, and lots of Gas-X, but it didn't help, and as the pain got worse, I was having a hard time breathing. I called my doctor and she told me to go to the emergency room where they had "imaging devices" to check me out. It was really stressful, because Samuel's family is slowly trickling into town, and he had taken some of them surfing. (Normally he wouldn't have left me, but his mom arrived a few days early, so we figured I'd be fine.)

Unfortunately, I couldn't get ahold of him, him being in the ocean and all, and he had the car and the carseat. I called someone for a ride and reluctantly left my sweet baby with her grandma, and a few bags of breastmilk. Samuel got my message shortly after that and met me at the hospital.

To make a long story short, they ran a zillion tests and drugged me up big time. I had a fever and they found signs of infection in my uterus and urinary tract. Luckily they were able to give me some IV antiobiotics, then some oral antibiotics, and discharged me.

I missed Kalia BIG TIME! And I was only away from her for six hours. But I wasn't able to breastfeed her for 24 hours because of the drugs I'd been given at the hospital. Luckily, a friend of mine has a 3 month old baby, and she has lots of frozen milk, which she generously shared with us.

Well, I saw my OB-GYN this morning, and she said that the infection probably started in the uterus as a result of my long labor, and the fact that I was dilated for so long...(leaving me wide open to germs and infection, pardon the pun.) She also told me I could breastfeed while on antibiotics (whew!) but that if my fever came back, I had to go back to the ER where they'd probably admit me and make me stay there with IV antibiotics until I was better.

MY WORD!! Who'd have ever thought. It's been really stressful, and the pain from the infection is so strong that pain killer only takes the edge off. I'm not feeling sorry for myself, after all, I don't know any different, this is all just part of RECOVERY to me, but anyway, it's been a crazy few days.

On one last (POSITIVE) note, I will tell you that I found out that a lot of my weight gain (especially at the end- 8 pounds in 2 weeks!) was water weight. I have lost 29 pounds in one week, isn't that crazy? It helps that 9 of it was baby. Sure makes me feel hopeful about getting back in shape. 15 lbs to go, and the nursing will help, no doubt.

Just wanted to share the good (and bad) news. Thanks again for all your love and support.

P.S. Kalia graduated out of her newborn diapers today. She lasted a whole week. She's already gained back the weight she lost, plus 2 ounces. We found out that she is 90th percentile in height and weight, and only 50th percentile in her head measurements, so no, she doesn't have an unusually big noggin. :)
Here's a few pictures:Me, my nursing shield, and my mother-in-law.Notice the feet!
This girl loves to sleep with her hands and arms UN-swaddled.
I swear she's not as big as she looks in this picture: :)

Thursday, August 30, 2007

Birth Announcement

I am just trying out my hand at digital scrapbooking. I spent the last week of my pregnancy working on this- and I just e-mailed it out. I still have a ton to learn,and if you have any tips or favorite sites, please let me know!

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

A Long Labor means a Long Story

SHE WAS SO WORTH IT!!
I couldn't decide if I should put up all these pictures and the Labor Story, but then I realized, this blog is so much a journal to me now, how could I not? I am going to print it all out and glue it in. to my actual journal later. You don't have to read it all, but enjoy the pictures. (And notice how swollen my face is at the beginning of the 28 hours of labor, versus at the end. It's kinda funny. Even funnier, you should have seen my thighs! They pretty much quadrupled!)So, Tuesday I saw my doctor, and she said I was only 1 cm dilated (still) and it was probably a few days away. I had some on/off contractions during the day, and wouldn't you know it, just as I'm getting ready to go to bed around midnight, they started coming regularly. But they were manageable. Still, I started writing them down to see how far apart they were. I didn't sleep a wink. 17 minutes, the next one 13 minutes, then 8, 9, 5, 7,6...they stayed between 7-8 until 3 a.m., when I had to wake Samuel to help me count through them. I also had him apply counter pressure to my back, since that's where I was feeling the pain. We were wondering how long it would take, and as the morning approached they were still about 7 minutes apart. We decided he should go to work, since it's only a mile away. Then, as soon as he left, they started getting stronger and 5 minutes apart. I called 4 friends and my sister. 4 out of 5 said go to the hospital. So I called Samuel back, and at 10 a.m. they admitted me telling me I was 90% effaced and 2-3 cm. NICE! I thought labor might go quick.

Oh so wrong. :) Here I am with my belly, waiting to get checked.I was trying to be strong, and not ask for an epidural too soon, so they wouldn't turn me down. But the back labor, as it's known, is believed to produce more painful contractions than regular ones. Still, I held out, and the nurse brought me a birthing ball, and that combined with breathing (TOTALLY HELPS!) more counter pressure from Samuel, and counting up and down through contractions, bought me another hour or two. (Don't I look so focused? Yeah, you have no choice BUT to focus.)
When we finally had a minute alone, Samuel gave me a beautiful blessing, and I knew that everything would be okay. That gave me peace throughout the long and hard ordeal.According to Samuel's notes, I got the blessing at 1 p.m., and the epidural at 1:45 p.m. They let Samuel watch it all, and he's still telling people stories of how crazy and cool it was. All I know is, I was contracting so hard while they were doing it, and then all of a sudden the pain MELTED away and I was literally in heaven.Next, my Dr. made a visit to the hospital and found that my water had not fully broken, as we thought. She called it a "forebag" which I'd never heard of. It was slowing down my labor-- I was still only at a 3. I was bummed. An hour or two later I made it to a 4, and they inserted a catheter since I wasn't peeing on my own (too numb!).

The first of the complications began. Every time I laid on my left side, (supposedly the "better side" for getting blood and oxygen to the baby) Kalia's heart rate would drop, drastically. They put me on oxygen, and made me stay on it, for the rest of labor (10 more hours).It wasn't helping enough. Next they decided they needed to put in more amniotic fluid (a substitute) hoping it would move the cord around, since it was possible that it was getting clamped or pinched or something like that. They inserted another cord/catheter thing and started flushing it into me. 4:30 p.m...and I'm only at a 5.

I talked to my mom on the phone at this point. She's sure I will dilate quickly from there, since the 1-4 part is usually the hardest. That didn't happen either.
At 8:15 p.m., my epidural suddenly wore off. The pain was unbelievable. It was still dripping into me, but within minutes I could feel full contractions, in the back, and also spreading like fire in the front. This hospital doesn't let you adjust it yourself. They had to bring the anaesthesiologist back in to do it-- and he was in a C-section, so I had to just wait it out. I tried to bear the pain, with Samuel desperately trying to help, but it took about 45 minutes for the dr. to come. I won't lie. I couldn't hardly bear it, and I cried several times.
I get my "booster" and they checked me again. This time I was sure I was almost there, after all, I'd felt the pain of those contractions! Bad news. ONLY dilated to a 6-7. AUGHH!! I couldn't believe it was taking so long. My doctor waited an hour and a half, then directed them to give me Pitocin to try to speed it up.
My epidural wore off again, this time the contractions were almost twice as strong, because you know that's what pitocin does. I was screaming for Samuel, begging for the Anaesthesiologist, and wouldn't you know it, he's in another c-section. More crying. He finally comes at 10:20 p.m. I hate him and love him all at the same moment.
The pitocin got me to a 9.5 at 10:55 p.m., but the baby wasn't moving down like she was supposed to. They waited another hour to see what happens.

Midnight: FREAKIN EPIDURAL WEARS OFF AGAIN. More crying- I am not as tough as I thought. I get another booster. Samuel's birthday comes and goes with me in labor the entire time. Baby doesn't land on his birthday.

1:30 a.m. I've been at a 10 for awhile. They have me push to see if I can get the baby to move down. (For those of you who know/care, the baby should have been at a "2" station, and you can push to a 4 station, and then out. My baby was at 0 station. She NEVER even made it to a 2. Ever.)I pushed and pushed and pushed. I was sooooooooo exhausted. I hadn't slept the night before, I hadn't eaten for 24 hours, and my pushing wasn't moving her. I developed a fever. They start filling me up with antibiotics at 2 a.m. I now have like, 8 monitors and 12 bags of stuff dripping into me (thus, the swelling, etc.)Oh yeah, and I threw up three times there towards the end. I can't decide if I'll put up the picture of me, trying not to throw up into the barf bag. It feels so personal.Well, at this point I had been dilated to a 10 for 3 hours with no baby dropping, and I had pushed for two hours (with an hour break in between.) The pushing was almost killing me. I felt like I had run a marathon, and then shown up at track practice and it was "400 sprints day", some of you know, where you line up, sprint a 400, stop and rest for 3 minutes, sprint another one, almost DIE at the end, then step up the line, sprint again. I will never be able to explain the exhaustion. I will say this- If I HAD been making progress, I probably could have gone on for one more hour, but when they finally leveled with me and told me that there was NO progress after all this, I knew that was the end of the pushing. They also told me that while I was pushing my guts out, fluid filled with meconium (baby poop) came out, which means the baby was in distress, and had a bowel movement, and it 's dangerous to them if they swallow it. It just confirmed that we needed to get her out soon.My doctor, over the phone, kindly explained and told me her opinion was that Kalia was just too big for my body to push out. I find it weird- I'm not a thin girl, just average, with average hips. But anyway, I also asked my nurse, and the resident who had been trying so hard to help me birth the baby, and they also confirmed what the doctor thought. My doctor did give me the option of pushing for ANOTHER hour, but I knew there was NO WAY I could do it, knowing what I knew. I accepted the C-section idea with SO much relief that I was done with my part. I had nothing left to give. Samuel didn't like the C-section idea at all, but later (after he saw Kalia's head) realized she wouldn't have come out any other way. (He said he could actually see a ring on her head that she was trying to mold to in order to get out, and it was way too small. )The C-section was a blur, and really quite awful for me. I was so drugged that I could barely stay awake and make sense of my surroundings. I was shaking SO bad, Samuel was holding my jaw shut. I was so groggy and nauseous, I wasn't even sure when I heard a little cry if it was my baby or not. Samuel watched the ENTIRE thing over the curtain, and was pretty fascinated by it all, and he said he only "got queasy once."
Here's the first picture of Kalia. It was 3:56 when they got her out. Notice her hands, stained yellowish green from the meconium. Poor girl. You can't see it here, but she had a very long cone head, from being in the birth canal for so long. Samuel described her as "marge simpson" which I INSIST he stop saying.Samuel showed me our baby Kalia at some point, then the doctor kindly gave me valium or something, and knocked me out. I was SO grateful.This is me a few hours later when I woke up. Aren't I gorgeous. LOL. This was the sweet nurse that coached me with pushing (and told me that I was one of the strongest pushers she'd ever seen. She was so sweet to reassure me that it wasn't my fault, and I loved her for it.)
Now you see some of the swelling right??Well, I held Kalia the next morning around 9. Love at first sight-- what more can I say.
It was all so worth it, and truly, I would do it again tomorrow for her if I had to. After three days at home with a newborn, we have yet to turn on the TV or radio. The Spirit she has brought into our home has been unbelievable, and we don't want to ruin it. I have cried EVERY day, tears of joy to have her. I can't believe the love I have for this little person, and I can't believe the love I have for my husband as he loves and adores her, and also me. He's changed every diaper and picked up everything I drop, brings me everything I need, helps me sit down, stand up, and he even cleaned and mopped today while I slept.I think I'll stop for now. Thanks for reading this far, if you made it. Here's a few more pictures (You KNOW we take like, 1000 a day!)
A few notes:
  • We love the boppy pillow!
  • It's so hot during the day, without our air conditioning on, which we're trying to use sparingly. Even little Kalia is hot, and prefers to chill in her diaper.
  • I still have lots of swelling in my legs, face, and hands (not to mention stomach) that should be leaving within the week, I hope. Stomach swelling, yeah, much longer than that.
  • Recovery is going well, I'm sore everywhere, and the incision hurts, but I'll be just fine.
  • I love love LOVE when Kalia curls up into a little ball on my chest. Even though she was 9 pounds, she's still so tiny:
Saying prayers?That beautiful smile we love:And that's all for now, folks!