Thoughts on Food and Eating

Well, this morning I stepped on the scale and saw a number- the lowest I have ever weighed, even lower than my high school weight. It's a weird (but good) feeling, but it's come at a price.

I have stuck to the TED diet. It's really changed my concept of eating. I USED to be such a pleasure eater, I loved eating. I frequently overate. Now that my diet is pretty bland, I've seen a few changes.
#1- Since I don't get much pleasure out of eating, I obviously only eat to make my hunger pangs go away. This means I am eating smaller portions, and my stomach has shrunk. (I know this for a fact. One day I tried to stuff in extra food, trying to get extra calories and boost my milk production. But just eating a little extra made me so full and sick that I couldn't eat for the rest of the day. It was so bizarre.)
#2- I've decided that if the day comes that we are all forced to eat nothing but our "food storage", we will all be okay. It won't be as bad as I anticipated. You just change your mentality from pleasure eating to survival eating. And when your stomach is full, you really can't complain.
#3- I try to add olive oil to EVERYTHING. I eat as many potato chips as I could ever dream of (the sea salt kind, cooked in sunflower or safflower oil. They're kind of hard to find). It's nice to not try to count calories or "limit my fats." Trying to FIND more fat is a whole new world.
#4- The only time that it is really hard to eat like this is when I am in a group of people, and I can see and smell their spaghetti, or bread, or donuts, or cookies. It's hard to even SEE it. So doing this diet while traveling or "celebrating" an event...it's pretty hard. Not hard as in I give in to temptation, hard as in it makes me feel sad and isolated.
#5- I tried adding in chicken and red pepper. It seems that both made Ella cry for a day or two. So I backed off. I will try them both again at a later date. The only food I've been able to add so far is Quinoa, which isn't very good, but at least it's really healthy.

So...I've lost about 10 lbs in the last month. I still can't exercise because of my leg and hip, which isn't better (need to go back to the Dr, probably for a MRI). It's weird losing weight without exercise, who'd have thought. I wouldn't mind losing 5 or so more, but the only problem is that I will then have to get a new wardrobe, and I don't really want to spend the money, since it's unlikely that I will maintain this weight after I can eat freely again. However, I may not be able to eat what I want until I stop nursing, and if I have my way, that will be in 7 months. So maybe I'll need a few new clothes.

Oh, and as for Ella, the GI specialist told me that Ella has silent reflux that is allergy-induced. (Silent because we can't see or hear signs of it, as other babies with reflux usually spit up and vomit like crazy.) The mucus in the poop is a sign of allergies. Most babies who have reflux ONLY have reflux, and therefore no mucus. So Ella doesn't have the reflux episodes as long as she's not getting the food proteins that her body doesn't like. She prescribed Neocate (if I want to quit nursing) and Prevacid (which I found out has Aspertame, at least the solutabs do, so I asked her to change it, she changed it to Prilosec.) I have not yet given the medicine to Ella, because she is not refluxing right now, and only has these "flare up" episodes when I test out food. I'm still trying to figure out what to do about the medication situation, since it's not a constant problem, you know?